Scared girl, age 12, writes:
I’m a 12 year old girl and I am defiantly still a virgin. I haven’t even had my first kiss yet, but my period is 4 days late. *it will be a year in October since I have had [i.e. started] my period.* I also looked up pregnancy symptoms and some of them are what I am feeling like every time I eat I feel sick like I need to throw up, I have had headaches and mostly stuff like that. Although it doesn’t seem like a big deal, Im very scared for some reason, and for some reason to tell my mom because I don’t want her to question if I’m a virgin. *which I am !*
Help ? ):
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Dear Scared girl,
While there are some occasional tabloid stories of girls who got pregnant even though they never really had sex (i.e. some guy masturbated in the same swimming pool that a girl was in, etc.), your chances of becoming pregnant without having intercourse are, essentially, just a teeny, tiny fraction of 1%. To become pregnant, you’ve got to have a live, healthy sperm from some guy swimming up your vagina and meeting your monthly egg (and that egg exists in your body just 24 hours max each month). While some women have reported that aliens took a medicine dropper and impregnated them by squirting up sperm into their bodies while they slept, my inclination is to believe that the tabloids are just desperate for readers (and sales)!
Frequently, however, when we’re worried that we might be pregnant, our bodies can give us many of the classic pregnancy symptoms. However, just because we’re experiencing those symptoms doesn’t mean that we really are pregnant. Those same symptoms could be just being caused by your hormones as your body continues to mature. Or, they could be caused by nerves, stress, or a virus or flu or you get the idea. Nerves are pretty amazing things.
There’s a true story told of how, at a ball game one time, people suspected that beverages purchased from a local drink vendor were contributing to food poisoning. Dozens of people who had drunk those beverages and who heard about the possibility of food poisoning became gravely ill – ill to the point that they even had to be taken to the hospital. When it was discovered that the true source of the food poisoning came from a local deli’s potato salad (and I may be off a bit on the exact details), and not from the drinks, the many people who had become gravely ill became instantly well once they were told the truth. It was all nerves. Pretty incredible.
Many years ago, in prep for my pre-med studies, I did some extensive research into psychosomatic diseases – that’s when our bodies get sick, with real symptoms, but a major cause of the illness can be contributed to that which is taking place in our head. Pretty crazy :) And, yes, I’ve had my nerves do the same thing to myself.
So, all of this rambling :) to say that I highly doubt that you are pregnant. However, if you do continue to experience the symptoms you describe, then there may be something else going on (but not pregnancy) which your doctor should look into. Our bodies are complex creations, and symptoms can be a reflection of something taking place inside (which could very well be just a virus or bacterial infection).